I really appreciated what you said about Jesus not being our King. I hope you don't mind my quoting a short piece from Miles Stanford's beautiful open letter to John Gerstner as he shared a piece of his testimony that deals with this concept:
"This is where my Antinomianism really comes into play. It is true that, by means of the Word, I ultimately came to know the Saviour as Lord--in the sense of His Deity: He is sovereign Lord of the universe. But He has never been Lord over me, whether it be rebirth, or new life. He is my Life; I am a son of God--which is far beyond and more intimate than Lordship. I acknowledge and confess Him as Lord, but the Word never speaks of Him as Lord in relation to the Body. He is to be Lord and King over the nation of Israel, but not over His beloved Bride, His very Body--"for we are members of His Body, of His flesh, and of His bones" (Eph. 5:30). In Him as Life; not under Him as Lord and King."

I love that!!!!!!!