Most of the Calvinists I know were dragged kicking and screaming to the doctrines of the Reformation. They didn't want to believe that Man is totally depraved and helpless and completely dependent on Another to do for him what he cannot do for himself. They didn't want to believe they were dead in trespasses and sins, and they didn't want to believe that they don't (and shouldn't) have a say in who gets into the Kingdom and who doesn't. The Reformed faith is far too humbling for most folks to wish it were true.

Assurance for a believer takes time, because it takes time to prove that one's faith is genuine through the tough times and failures as well as the triumphs and mountain tops. Our faith is in a Person and His word, not some formula that guarantees salvation to whoever says "the sinner's prayer." It seems to me that their sense of assurance should be precarious too: Was I really sincere when I prayed that prayer with Pat Robertson on TV? Maybe I should pray it again just to make sure... For them the matter is as much subjective (because it depends on their sincerity - not only at the moment they pray, but in every moment thereafter) as it is based on the "objective" little formula they've adopted.

Scripture actually gives us a hint, though, as to who the elect are:

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"For consider your calling, brethren, that there were not many wise, not many mighty, not many noble; but God has chosen the foolish to confound the wise, and the weak to shame the strong; the base, the despised God has chosen; the Nobodies to nullify the Somebodies, so that no man may boast before God (1st Corinthians 1:26-29, paraphrased)."

-Robin