Maybe this will help. It is taken from Spurgeon's The Agony of Gethsemane.
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What is it then, think you, that so peculiarly marks off Gethsemane and the griefs thereof? We believe that now the Father put Him to grief for us. It was now that our Lord had to take a certain cup from the Father’s hand. Not from the Jews, not from the traitor Judas, not from the sleeping disciples, not from the devil came the trial now, but it was a cup filled by One whom He knew to be His Father, but who nevertheless He understood to have appointed Him a very bitter potion, a cup not to be drunk by His body and to spend its gall upon His flesh, but a cup which specially amazed His soul and troubled His inmost heart. He shrank from it, and therefore be ye sure that it was a draught more dreadful than physical pain, since from that He did not shrink; it was a potion more dreadful than reproach, from that He had not turned aside; more dreadful than Satanic temptation, — that He had overcome: it was a something inconceivably terrible, amazingly full of dread, which came from His Father’s hand. This removes all doubt as to what it was, for we read “It pleased the Lord to bruise Him, He hath put Him to grief: when Thou shalt make His soul an offering for sin.” “The Lord hath made to meet on Him the iniquity of us all.” He hath made Him to be sin for us though He knew no sin. This, then is that which caused the Saviour such extraordinary depression. He was now about to “taste death for every man,” to bear the curse which was due to sinners, because He stood in the sinner’s place and must suffer in the sinner’s stead. Here is the secret of those agonies which it is not possible for me to set forth in order before you, so true is it that —
“Tis to God, and God alone, That His griefs are fully known.”
Yet would I exhort you to consider these griefs awhile, that you may love the Sufferer. He now realized, perhaps for the first time, what it was to be a sin bearer. As God He was perfectly holy and incapable of sin, and as man He was without original taint and spotlessly pure; yet He had to bear sin, to be led forth as the scapegoat bearing the iniquity of Israel upon His head, to be taken and made a sin offering, and as a loathsome thing (for nothing was more loathsome than the sin offering) to be taken without the camp and utterly consumed with the fire of divine wrath. Do you wonder that His infinite purity started back from that? Would He have been what He was if it had not been a very solemn thing for Him to stand before God in the position of a sinner? yea, and as Luther would have said it, to be looked upon by God as if He were all the sinners in the world, and as if He had committed all the sin that ever had been committed by His people, for it was all laid on Him, and on Him must the vengeance due for it all be poured; He must be the centre of all vengeance and bear away upon Himself what ought to have fallen upon the guilty sons of men. To stand in such a position when once it was realized must have been very terrible to the Redeemer’s holy soul. Now also the Saviour’s mind was intently fixed upon the dreadful nature of sin. Sin had always been abhorrent to Him, but now His thoughts were engrossed with it, He saw its worse than deadly nature, its heinous character, and horrible aim.
