Pilgrim

Though I have read books on the doctrines of grace as well as read many articles on them as well; it certainly doesn't hurt to read more.

What you said is basically my understanding on the matter, however as I said before this pastor is not a big fan of the Reformers and he could care less if he is agreement with any of them on this issue. Reading between the lines, I would think that calling myself a Reformed Baptist would be an oxymoron to him.
I wonder if he has actually read what Baptists like Spurgeon or Pink believes on the subject.

Although obviously I am in agreement with Reformed exegesis on the matter, I know beyond a doubt that if I am going to answer his e-mail, I better take my time (which at the moment I am in short supply of).
If I quote Reformers on the issue, I will be accused of parroting Reformed thought; rather than Scripture itself.

Although I believe that what Scripture says on a given matter, is the most important. If my understanding of Scripture was different than what other Calvinists believed. I would suspect that the problem is probably with me rather than them.
I have a hard time understanding how someone who holds to all five points of Calvinism could disagree with them on this particular matter.

That being said, his belief seems to be that the words "calling" or "illumination" are the words that the Bible uses when it speaks of irresistibly drawing people to Christ.
In this respect, although he is in error he seems to use these words in the same manner we would use "regeneration".
I am not sure I would go this far, but part of me thinks if I make too big a deal about this, I could possibly be making a mountain out of a mole hill.
It also appears (again I need to read what he said a little deeper) that he believes that God soveriegnly gives us salvation from start to finish. This is something that although Arminians will say other wise, logically their words prove otherwise. What I am speaking to here of course is monergism vs. synergism.
Also the issue is over "ordo salutis" (sp?) not whether we receive salvation through faith alone by grace alone.

I intend to write him back, but when I do it will be from Scripture.

I thought I would mention that the Pastor that I have been talking about has written a book on the doctrines of grace called ‘The Bond of Peace’; which has been endorsed by Pastor Erwin Lutzer. He contend that rather than divide Christians the doctrines of grace “are intended to unite us as a people of God by humbling us and causing us to worship and give praise to God alone for our salvation.”

Tom