The Highway Forums General Discussion Open Forum Openness in the Christian community

I am very proud of my humility <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/hairout.gif" alt="" />

Dear Jeremy,

In addition to the relevant passages you have been referred to about "openness" during confession of sin, there is a very important principle in Galatians 6:1:

Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted.

In other words, there are 2 opposing tendencies we must avoid. On one hand, without a covenantal commitment to openness in community, members simply cannot know each other well enough to know if a trespass has occurred or, if so, how to gently restore the one(s) involved.

(I for one feel the need for such openness should compel local churches to avoid exceeding a reasonable size, and fear that the mega-church model, even if coupled with sound theology, destroys much body life. I am grateful that our church covenant reads, in part, "I will submit myself humbly to the discipline of the church, my elders, my sisters and brothers, that I may live a life of discipleship. When I fail in any portion of this covenant, I will seek my brothers and sisters, confess my need, and find strength from our mutual bonds of life in the Spirit. I will take the initiative regularly to meet with other members of ... in order to share each other's joys and sorrows, plans and problems, so as to bring mutual encouragement and obedience in the work of the Lord and in our personal lives.")

On the other hand, the several confession/discipline Scriptures clearly indicate that as the combination of times/places/involved parties varies, different approaches are necessary, and the wrong approach would be most unedifying for the church and dishonoring to the Lord.

For example, let's take Mr. and Mrs. A and Mr. and Mrs. B. During a time of corporate worship at which all 4 are present with their children, Mr. B. announces, "I confess that this morning I am been burning with lust for, and committing adultery in my heart with, Mrs. A. I try not to, but everytime I see her in that outfit she's got on, I just can't help myself. "

If he "shares" that little piece of information, what edifying effect will it have on ... Mrs. A? Mr. A? Mrs. B? their children? the rest of the church? But if the church promotes an unregulated transparency during public worship, how will Mr. B not feel compelled to so share, or if he is wise enough not to, how will he not feel hypocritical when others make their confessions?

No, far safer to heed the biblical guidelines in this. Some situations--as above--should be confessed first to the Lord and then, if restorative exhortation and instruction is needed, only to those able to assist without being similarly tempted (this would certainly apply to sexual matters and unresolved interpersonal disputes). Other situations are matters which may not be tempting or offensive to others but are simply so unique to our depraved natures that there would not be time in a worship service for everyone to air all their laundry (e.g. let's say I get angry with people whose name starts with "S" because it makes me think of snakes/spiders/scorpions ...), or are so generally common during sanctification that everyone is constantly needing to confess them (e.g. "I'm so proud". Of course if one person confesses this, everyone else feels they must as well, lest they be thought ... proud!). Finally, there are occasionally unique situations which are appropriate for the body at large to hear. I have not regretted confessing before our church and publically asking forgiveness several years ago, a willful disregard of safety which resulted in a car accident which could have resulted--but by God's grace did not--in serious injury or death to my passengers, boys from several church families as well as my own. Since that time, in similar situations (driving tired), the memory of that confession surfaces and spurs me on to pull over and grab a few winks rather than tempt the Lord again.

So, although it doesn't fit in your poll format, I would say, be as open as possible within biblical bounds, in a way that brings glory to the Lord Christ rather than the person confessing, and builds up His holy church in repentance, faith and loving obedience.

In our (PCA) order of worship we have a Corporate Confession of Sin followed by a Silent Confession. Do churches really encourage confession of sin individually and verbally within the context of the corporate worship service? I have never heard of such a thing. I hope it isn't so.

Thanks for the reply Paul. It was very well thought out and enlightening and one thing that I find that helps me on long trips is mucho coffee. <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/coffee2.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/BigThumbUp.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Dave.

Kim,

As far as churches "encourag(ing) confession of sin individually and verbally within the context of the corporate worship service" I have no direct knowledge; although from the several responses to this thread it seems like there might be a continuum of practices out there.

If the personal example I cited above, even after being balanced by the regulatory principles I both concurred with and elaborated on, still gives the impression the my church practices and encourages unregulated, individual, open, verbal, communal confession during corporate worship, I must simply state that is not the case.

The few examples I can remember of what my church considers appropriate public confession have been both infrequent (maybe once every few years?) and have involved offenses which had not required official discipline, but were yet known to at least part of the body as a whole.

In my own example, I had already privately confessed my carelessness to the parents of the boys in my car prior to the service; but since I knew that others had seen or heard of the incident, and also because I felt it improper to publically praise God for graciously delivering us from premature death without acknowledging my guilt in the matter, I did both.

The other instances I recall have involved: a member who had not come to church for a long time, asking forgiveness for forsaking his duty to meet with the body; individuals asking forgiveness for having behaved publically in a (non-scandalous, but) generally offensive manner to the body or to the Lord; and a teacher or elder correcting an instance of faulty exegesis the prior week. There are probably others, but the common thread has been a need--far short of calling a disciplinary meeting--where the entire body would profit by hearing a particular confession.

As I tried to emphasize in my response to Jeremy, however, the vast majority of confession should be done:

• privately, or
• to offended individuals, or
• to the more spiritual in the body, or
• to the elders (with their wives, where women are involved), or
• to the church in settings--such as prayer meetings or retreats--allowing elaboration of complex (but not interpersonal) situations

In a healthy, "open" church, especially a small, parish-model community of believers, all of the above types of confession should be functioning regularly.

Thanks for the clarification, Paul. I'm still trying to see how this fits into the context of the worship service. May I ask at what point in the service did you stand and confess? Was there an invitation from the pulpit to share anything that needed to be confessed to the congregation?

I guess I'm trying to figure out how I, if I were in the exact same situation as you were, would be able (in the context of our order of worship) to bring this to the attention of the whole congregation.

Please believe me, I'm not trying to pick a fight, just pick your brain. I haven't experienced such a thing before and am trying to understand. <img src="/forum/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> By your examples I can see where this would be a good thing if handled properly.

Kim, given your earlier description of your order of worship, it sounds like it might not normally be possible; in your circumstance, I would ask an elder, in advance of the service, for permission to address the congregation at an appropriate opportunity.

Our congregation, on the other hand, is encouraged to respond individually during times of corporate worship, with the understanding that such responses are to glorify Christ and edify the body, under biblical regulatory principles and the discernment of the elders. More specifically, such responses might range from readings of appropriate Scripture, singing of congregational song, spontaneous prayer and praise, praise for sovereign resolution of specific situations, and as I mentioned above, occasionally confession of public matters.

Thanks, Paul.

I don't know what it's like in some denominations and some churches, but I read the Bible and the Bible talks about God being our (Christians) Father and Christ our brother and co-heir and I read that we're all going to face judgement and everything we've kept in secret and in the darkness and in private will come out in the wash as it were when we get to that last judgement. Further, being co-heirs creates an equality, we who are older have probably been in the troubles we who are younger are in and the younger should hope to get advice and help from those further on the path. Further, what does it look like to the lost world when we act as though we're not sinners too? It's like saying we're better, but we know our status has nothing to do with us, we're saved by grace and the free electing choice of God. I do believe we have better results when we do not hide what cannot ultimately stay hidden.

That said, in the practical sense, a lot of us "Christians" are not confident enough in God's provision or in His free grace, or we're surrounded by people who don't have the qualities of mercy, understanding, and forgiveness, and so it seems as though it would be social suicide to admit to some of our sins. It's a sign of our own depravity and lack of sensitivity that we act as though some sins are okay and offend God less and so we all laugh those off but we repress and push away those whose sins are distasteful to us and our smug moral superiority. Because we're concerned about the social aspect (how will this affect my ability to get ahead in life and in my "church/social club") that we don't admit our "major sins" (which aren't the name sins because these sins I allude to are the unnameable, unmentionable and distasteful sins) and we fear the day when someone finds out.

Let's not worry though, according to that great American theological document, the U. S. Constitution, we have a right (God given, shush, don't tell the athiest) to refrain from making an incriminating statement.

Do I admit all my sin? No. Am I aware of all my sin? No. Do I admit most of what I do know? I hope so.

I think that axiom is true, "Confession is good for the soul." and it's also good for everyone in general. Now, if only we could find some trustable Christian (who might pray about it since that might avail to something) and we could confess our sins one to another. (James 5 anyone?)

The ever obnoxious, arrogant, and all around sinful Bro. Luke.